Dang. It’s been so long since I last blogged that I forgot my WordPress username and password. Actually, I sorta forgot the name of my blog, which is unfortunate, considering that it’s the same as my legal name (minus the .com… I think). And you know what? I don’t even have a great excuse. I mean, I have two emotional ankle biters (AKA my two small children) who follow me around, but that’s just par for the course.

I was also working on an article for an actual publication, but that wrapped up a couple of weeks ago (insert shameless self-promotion: read it here!). No, the truth is that I have been suffering from blogger’s block/procrastination. And I find that the longer I avoid writing something that I know I should write, the worse the block and the general uneasiness gets, until my whole brain is dominated by an endlessly-looping lululemon-esque soundtrack: “Do it now! Do it now! Do it now! Don’t put off until tomorrow what you can do today! Also, drink water and floss and dance and move to Vancouver!” So in an effort to stop the soundtrack (am I the only person who thinks that lululemon should stick to producing clothes instead of slogans/life philosophies?), I’m forcing myself to blog today.
So now that I’m on the topic, why don’t I share a few other recent examples of my procrastinating streak:
I was writing an article about the aquaponics scene in Calgary, and after I’d completed an interview with one of the main growers, I knew that I would have to get quotes and interviews with a bunch of chefs, grocers, and other growers.

So I did what any self-respecting writer would do: I composed some very nice emails, and fired them into the void. And I waited. And waited. And strangely enough, nothing happened. After about a week, I knew that I was going to have to do something. I’d promised my editor a really quick/boneheaded turnaround, and I needed those quotes. I couldn’t put it off any longer. So I did one of the hardest things I have ever done. I put my kids to bed. I typed out a script. And I prepared to phone people. If there is one thing that I hate above all others, it is using the telephone. Growing up, I would beg my mother to make phone calls for me, and when she started refusing (something about being too busy raising five children), I persuaded my sister to be my secretary. But age 32 seems like a reasonable age to start making your own professional calls. So, legs shaking under the table, I picked up that phone, and started reading my script. The sound of blood rushing in my ears, and my flaming cheeks were a little distracting, but I got the information I needed. And as a bonus, the lingering puke-y feeling prevented me from engaging in my daily chocolate binge.
The other thing that I’ve been procrastinating about lately is buying a new computer. I realize that some people get excited about purchasing electronics, but I am not one of them. It’s not that I don’t want new stuff; it’s that I have no clue what I should buy. So I leave it until the last possible minute. Until my aging computer becomes incapable of spending 5 minutes unplugged and crashes if I hold it the wrong way and the return key doesn’t work because my husband somehow spilled salad dressing all over the keyboard and I just hope that I backed everything up because there seem to be a LOT of error reports lately.

So I shipped the ankle biters off to my in-laws’, and hauled myself to Best Buy. I found the nearest just-crawled-out-from-under-a-gaming-rock employee, and asked him what he thought I should buy.
“Well, this computer has a lot of dodge RAM, and this one holds, like, 59 dodecahedrobytes of data, and the specs on this one include like K9 DOS C++.”
“uhhh….ok. So, should I buy a PC or a Mac?”
“Personal preference.”
So I went home. And did what I do best: googled the problem until random people on random forums convinced me that my computing life was over no matter what I purchased. By the time I had to pick up my kiddies, I was in a state of electronic despair, and ready to grab any life raft tossed my way. So when my in-laws said “you know, we’ve heard that Chromebooks are really great” I said, “good enough!” And then I hauled myself back to Best Buy, pointed at a random model and said, “I’ll take that one!” So far, it’s working out great. The fact that it doesn’t run Word makes me a little nervous, but I’ll deal with that problem another day…
Chuckle, chuckle! – I love the bit about getting help from gamers at Best Buy!
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Just to clarify, there is a reasonable level of doubt about who spilled the salad dressing. I do not accept the blame outright.
Anyway, it was for the best.
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